You all know that I'm not a big fan of the Kinect. Part of me understands where Microsoft is going with it, but I don't think it's even necessary to go there. The bevy of craptastic Kinect games since the launch of the peripheral have proven me mostly right so far, but if you wanted any more proof that everything the Kinect touches just turns to shit, look no further.

Apparently it's not just video games that turn into puddles of gurgling putrescence once they are made "Better With Kinect", but even shows about the Kinect can't escape its innate ability to turn once wonderful and holy things into a swampy and fetid goo, churning with fecal remains and hog sweat.

Everything about the video below is just wrong. From the forced excitement of the hosts, to the terrible puns and rounding it all off with some fairly horrible looking Star Wars Kinect footage. And I sure am glad that the female host wore a "Geek Girl" t-shirt, or else I wouldn't have any idea that she's 'into video games.' Thanks for clearing that up for us.  Everything about the hosts simply screams "I was a model who wanted to host a show but this is the only gig I could get. What is this Geek shit?"

Just watch. It's not quite as bad as the Project Natal Family...but it's up there.

UPDATE: After a flood of negative comments and 500+ dislikes against 3 likes, Microsoft has pulled the video. Good job standing behind your product Microsoft.  The only thing worse than creating shit, is not having the courage to stand behind it.

UPDATE II: It's uploaded to the Inside Xbox channel. Enjoy.

UPDATE III: And now Microsoft has pulled it from their Inside Xbox channel, so I'll reinstate my previous comment. "Good job standing behind your product Microsoft.  The only thing worse than creating shit, is not having the courage to stand behind it." We'll get it back up if we find it posted somewhere else.

[Source: Gameranx]

Comments

  • Avatar
    Rhineville
    12 years, 10 months ago

    It pisses me off to no end when my elderly aunt says "The Kinect is so good, my grandchildren ARE the controller" because I know then who the above video was made for.

  • Avatar
    TheFlameLurker
    12 years, 10 months ago

    It looks like it works so well...Its like I can play just about every Star Wars game that ever came out in the 90's all over again except with my body!

  • Avatar
    Actionreplay
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Normally I would say get Tina Wood or Morgan Webb but hey, they suck just as hard now.

  • Avatar
    fallouttalove3
    12 years, 10 months ago

    i am so-WOAH-not excited at-WOAH-all for the-WOAH-kinect's future. oh, and at 5 min, his hand goes through the tv.

  • Avatar
    J52
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Nintendo's got one of these things too: http://www.justin.tv/fourplayerpodcast/b/278133376

  • Avatar
    Bob Webb
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Dear god, I had to turn it off not even a minute in. This isn't entertainment, it's punishment. It just cements the idea that this system just isn't for us (at least our generation). I think they've given up trying to sell it to adults and are instead targeting their children; this is the only crowd indiscriminate enough to swallow this down.

  • Avatar
    Zladko
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Stopped at 1:40. Nope.

  • Avatar
    Rawkmaster
    12 years, 10 months ago

    I felt sick after watching this so I went to webmd, apparently I now have Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease

  • Avatar
    Aged Milk
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Woah. I totally have to get a Kinect now so I can play the ultra mega-mega title, Kinect Star Wars. And I don't even own a 360. *fake teethy smile* :D

  • Avatar
    rabbeseking
    12 years, 10 months ago

    That girl with the short blonde hair is kind of cute.

    Everything else is fucking hilarious.

  • Avatar
    s1yfox
    12 years, 10 months ago

    My boy, what have they done to you, gaming? What have they done :(

  • Avatar
    Nolan Hedstrom
    12 years, 10 months ago

    It hurts... The ultra mega mega title? The very second I saw Kinect Star Wars and heard him say "Lightsaber on!" I knew this game would be atrocious, and it is. Why would I want to control a Jedi with my body when it controls like, well I could make a horribly not pc joke, but I wont. It controls BAD.
    I'm my opinion, those Dox Equis commercials are a decent marketing campaign that work, and this xbox one is horrible.
    What was one of the coolest scenes in Star Wars Episode 1? The credits? That movie was horrible.
    So Mass Effect 3 will have "serious Kinect integration" I hope I can turn it all off, the only thing that sounds like it might be interesting to use, but probably be more frustrating that it's worth, is the voice commands.
    This video makes me sad. I took my time to go to YouTube and dislike this video.

  • Avatar
    K A
    12 years, 10 months ago

    After watching that video, I sort of feel like punching a baby. :/

  • Avatar
    AdjacentKitten
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Hey, someone's gotta like the Kinect. Might as well be them.

  • Avatar
    Nostreborjt
    12 years, 10 months ago

    I just couldn't watch it, I had to turn it off after about a minute.
    Everything about the Kinect seems kinda... gross.

  • Avatar
    WingZero
    12 years, 10 months ago

    OMG...wtf is this?!
    It hurts to watch....

  • Avatar
    Sargent Safety
    12 years, 10 months ago

    40 seconds in and it already makes that dreadful Apps show seem watchable.

  • Avatar
    Shazza1990
    12 years, 10 months ago

    They seem so false, can't them though I suppose :/

  • Avatar
    StückBrot
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Joseph, ur uber liked comment on the video got pulled, what did u write to insult them? ;)

  • Avatar
    lemith
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Ugh,I hate you motion gaming. Sooooo much.

  • Avatar
    Shiro2809
    12 years, 10 months ago

    Oh how I wish I was in time to see this before it was pulled. I really hope you can find another one so everyone that missed it can see.

  • Avatar
    Remembering: When Microsoft Was Good at Marketing
    12 years, 9 months ago

    [...] No I’m not talking about Blackwater Kinect the game, I’m talking about the recent Kinect all Access show which focused on Star Wars Kinect. If you haven’t seen it yet, you can check it out [...]

  • Avatar
    Xander
    12 years, 9 months ago

    Yeah, who needs the gym when you can flail around like an epileptic for hours on end? This is why I never watch these gaming shows; so much cheese. There are really only a handful of games that even use motion gaming appropriately (Silent Hill: Shattered Memories, any of the Wii rail shooters, etc.), and its been "popular" for something like five years now. Please console developers, just stop trying.

    Also, like rabbeseking said, the girl is pretty hot, but even she, and the dude's accent, can't save this travesty.