I’m sure you are all quite finished dabbing the tears from your eyes, have solved the mystery of the Origami Killer, and have sore thumbs from relentlessly pressing x to call for Jason by now. Sony Entertainment has bamboozled you in its little web of lies and DECEIT into making you think that Heavy Rain is the most progressive thing to hit gaming since Rob the Robot. But, my dear friends, there is a dark cloud hanging over these times. For there is a little secret, one much more interesting than anything involving dead children.
There is another game, one from way back in 1991, that to this day is still more progressive than Heavy Rain could ever even dream to be. That game is Out of this World and I’m going to prove it to you. Hit the jump to read my reasons why Out of this World is still more progressive than Heavy Rain 18 years later.
Male Protagonist with Red Hair
Look at that picture and stand in awe at the fiery mane of heavy red locks which our protagonist sports. Those shivers going down your back are for a few reasons. First of all it is very rare for a game developer to have the foresight and the vision to create a main character with red molten locks of love like that…and then have him be a male. Bloodrayne and Nariko are females so their breasts give them a free pass. Well what about Dwarves!? I can hear you asking. Well everyone knows that Dwarves are not really people, should never be acknowledged and should be burned in a great pyre in the middle of Central Park. This is common knowledge.
Just look at him. Look at the majesty of that burning filament. It’s almost like you are in a game where you are controlling Conan O’Brian himself. And as we all know, a game where you control Conan O’Brian would be the most beautiful game ever made. So this is the closest any of us is ever going to get.
A male protagonist with red hair is way more original than any of the cookie cutter characters that Heavy Rain has to offer, and boy is there sure a boatload of them. A scraggly looking dad in search for his son? Turn on the Lifetime Channel. A fat swarthy detective? Just only every detective movie ever made. An FBI agent with a drug problem? Please. A Ukrainian Prostitute? I can’t go to the corner store without getting my dick stuck in one.
No. All that effort into making cookie cutter, and boring, characters and all they had to do was use a little #FF0000.
Not one ounce of dialogue is needed to tell a compelling story.
Unfortunately Quantric Dream has never heard of subtly. A “less is more” idea in which stories and ideas, even complex ones, can be conveyed with the smallest amount of sensory input. Out of this World, however, knows this idea very well and tells a compelling, action packed, story without one line of dialogue. Perhaps our Red Haired Hero is a mute and that is why the only job he can keep is running tests on a Haldron Collider at night. But that is besides the point. While Heavy Rain bombards us with line after line of poorly written and poorly acted dialogue, Out of this World leaves it up to the player to deduce the story through the visuals and nothing more. I can honestly say that the first instance Ethan Marsh spoke I wished with all my being that he would never speak again.
We all know how that turned out.
We don’t need no stinkin’ Motion Capture
You may look at Heavy Rain and revel in how smooth everything is and how natural everyone moves. Well I’m sorry to break your hearts my little Dolphin Nuggets but it’s all based on LIES. Quantic Dream is actually outfitted with an entire Motion Capture studio and has been moonlighting as a Motion Capture services company for the past ten years. That’s right my friends. Quantic Dream has been quite the whore trolloping its services up and down Mass Media Ave. So that when you stick your disk in, and you feel the warm slime within, that’s the residue of a hundred other companies that have used her services right before you.
Out of this World, on the other hand is a pure virgin in white, laying in an open field in the sun, just waiting to give herself to you and to you only. Each frame of animation in that game was lovingly hand crafted, each nuance just there waiting for your first touch…your first caress.
Out of this World is not only more progressive, it also doesn’t smell like 50 bikers and dried Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Press X to Jason < Press X to SHOOT FUCKING LASERS!
This is not so much where Out of this World is more progressive as much as it’s just blatantly better. In Heavy Rain you get the once in a lifetime chance to play the father of a bratty kid, running through the mall looking for him after we walks away from you. And this is AFTER you spent some of your hard earned money buying him a goddamn balloon. Ever go into the mall and see a haggard, worn-down, looking parent trying to control their screaming brat of a child? Can you feel the misery wafting off of their face? Well in Heavy Rain you can BE that parent!! JOY! Yes. Only on the PS3 can you experiencing the soul crushing realities of parenthood and responsibility!
So put down that controller and pick up Out of this World to shoot some fucking LASERS! And these aren’t just any lasers mind you. I’m sure if David Cage had anything to do with it they would be lasers that shoot EMOTION RAYS at their targets to make them break down in the middle of the street in the rain. No, my friends these are lasers coming from brilliance. Not only do these lasers shoot…but they also shoot through walls, and not only do they shoot through walls…they actually MAKE walls as well! Can you even get your putrid minds around that my little cock-monkeys from hell? These lasers have 2 power-up abilities and a normal firing mode. One power up ability shoots through walls, doors and obstacles and the other power up ability creates a laser wall to use as a shield. My God just thinking about it I think I just shat myself…or at the very least have a minor erection. Perhaps both.
2 Brilliant People = 75+ normal people
This is the list of people responsible for bringing you Heavy Rain.
|Pascal Langdale (Ethan Mars),
Jacqui Ainsley (Madison Paige),
Judi Beecher (Madison Page),
Sam Douglas (Scott Shelby),
Leon Ockenden (Norman Jayden),
Mike Powers (Carter Blake),
Aurélie Bancilhon (Lauren Winter),
Max Renaudin (Shaun Mars),
Quentin de Gruttola (Shaun Mars),
Ginnie Watson (Grace Mars),
Leslie Clack (Charles Kramer),
Anthony Hickling (Gordi Kramer)
Associate ProducerAlexandre Plissonneau
Assistant ProducerRomain Castillos
Outsourcing CoordinatorEmilie Ragot
Talent CoordinatorFrédérique Barkoff
Lead Game BuilderSophie Buhl
Game Building TeamBruno Bouvret, Julien Colas, Nathalie Delga,Benjamin Douchy, Bertrand Huet, Alexis Moroz,Axel Riviere, Simon Wasselin
Lead Game PlayCaroline Marchal
Game Play TeamRaoul Barbet, Gabriel Esteves
Assistant DirectorSteve Kniebihly
Camera TeamMaxime Brochen, Steven Brochen, Damien Charbon
Lead Game LogicJean-Charles Perrier
Game Logic TeamErwan Bancal, Grégoire Diaconu, Bertrand Faure,Nicolas Holleville, Jérôme Jany
Lead EngineRonan Marchalot
Engine TeamFranck Bourguet, Philippe Desgranges,François Fruneau, Vincent Graveleau,David Haguenauer, Vincent Hamm, Eric Lescop
Lead ToolsDamien Castelltort
Tools TeamCédric Audru, Raphael Lahure, Aurélien Loizeau,Arnaud Mathieu, Vincent Piedeloup,Vladimir Votiakov
Chief Set DesignerThierry Flamand
Concept ArtistsFrançois Baranger, Benoit Godde
Costume DesignerEmilie Ragot
Architectural Documentation & BlueprintsCécilia Blom, Virginie Hernvann, Emilie Jouvet,Chantal Reunif
Additional Concept ArtistMorgan Yon
Lead SetsChristophe Brusseaux
Senior Set ArtistPhilippe Aballea
Set ArtistsSebastien Andre, Jonathan Benainous,Laurent Bertoux, Gil Cornut, Norbert Crétinon,Frederic Grillot, Alexandre Mangon-Olivier
FX ArtistSylvain Muzé
Interface ArtistSébastien Ricolfi
Lead CharactersThierry Prodhomme
Character ArtistsKatarina Djordjevic, Ronan Rouxel
Additional Character ArtistsSaid Bouaoun, Christophe Bouchet,Ángel Gabriel Díaz Romero, Stephane Dufournier,Daniel Moreno, Lionel Cregut, Loic Zimmermann
Havok ArtistWilliam Le Henanff
Facial Rigger & AnimatorYann Gaborieau
Facial Animation TeamCatherine Esteves, Tiphaine Mourmant,Hélène Pierre, Marjorie Vaysettes
Rigging TeamJulien Depoortere, David Hooghe, Bruce Taj,Cedric Nicolas
Lead AnimatorClement Castanier
Animation TeamRobin Armstrong, Julien Beilles, Fabrice Bon,Julien Caillaud, Julien Condom, Helene Galtier,Adeline Garcia, Alexandre Roche, Vanessa Ruffra,Rafael Nogues, Sylvain Rohart, Jonathan Zahut,Julien Soret
Lead Motion CaptureJeremy Meunier
Senior Mocap ArtistHiroko Masuda
Mocap AssistantLuisa Michelotti
Set AssistantsRaoul Barbet, Antoine Cerqueus
Motion Capture TrackersMarie Delsol, Suzie Polgatti
Sound Design ManagerXavier Despas
Sound FX TeamChristian Babelian, Mathieu Muller,Mathieu Fiorentini
Sound FX Team ConsultantNicolas Bredin
Recording EngineerJean-Jacques Toroella
Lead QAJérôme Vu Than
QA TeamCyril Ben Abdallah, Vincent Eustache,Jeanne Lim Koun, Clemence Maurer,Marc Soune Seyne, Marc Soune-Seyne,Michaël Troger, Julien Vuong, Mathieu Goulin
IT ManagerGauthier Mabille
Network & System AdministratorFrédéric Joassin
Ass. Human ResourcesIsabelle Poinsot
AccountingSandrine Grosselin, Nathalie Pariset
Original Soundtrack Composer and ConductorNormand Corbeil
Soundtrack recorded atAbbey Road Studios London
Soundtrack recorded byJonathan Allen
AssistantsLewis Jones, Paul Pritchard
Abbey Road Studio ManagerColette Barber
Orchestra ContractorIsobel Griffiths
Assistant Orchestra ContractorCharlotte Matthews
Orchestra LeaderThomas Bowes
tunts Coordinator and StuntmanOlivier Schneider
Stunts CrewMichael Troude, Virginie Arnaud, Grégory Loffredo,Patrick Vo, Vincent Haquin, Ben Badra,Sébastien Vandenberghe, Vincent Bersoullé
Dev Team Mocap ActorsDamien Charbon, Steve Kniebihly, Axel Riviere,Vanessa Ruffra
Casting DirectorPaul de Freitas
Additional CastingNina Gold
Legal ConsultationKenneth S. Yudell
Philadelphia SoundDonald F. McKenna Jr.
Additional StaffBrice Tinguad, Francisco A. Cortina,Steven Stahlberg, Cesar Sampedro,Stephane Bertout, Quentin Guillemineau
3D Graphics Development ServicesPearl Digital Entertainment
Motion Capture Post-production ServicesAnimation Vertigo
In‑game Imagees© 2009 Jupiterimages
In-game cartoons courtesy ofLes Gobelins - L'École de l'image
PyratsYves Bigerel, Bruno Dequier, Bea Fiquet,Nicolas Gueroux
VoodooRomain Baudy, Ludovic Bouancheau,Liane Cho Han, Yann Le Gall, Marietta Ren,Sebastien Wojda
Cocotte MinuteThibault Berard, Sylvain Marc, Loic Mermont,Amandine Pecharman, Nathalie Robert,Romain Vacher
Developed thanks to the support of theCentre National de la Cinématographie [CNC]
And this is the list of people who brought you Out of this World.
Developed and Designed by - Eric Chahi
Music by - Jean-Francois Freitas
Nothing more needs to be said here.
I would say that I HOPE I convinced you but I know in my heart of hearts that one cannot reasonably deny the evidence I have brought to the table here. I now send you all out into the world as more informed people, better people, prettier people. You have drunk from my font...now you may go and help others.